Distance & Being Apart !

Yes ..today audrey is flying over to uk for further studies ..

I really din't expect that i will cry ...cause i don't think i will , yet , i cried like shit @@

all the best to audrey , she will definitely learn more and gain more : )

gosh ....was thinking about what would actually happened if im the one who is in the terminal and saying goodbye to my family and friends ...it's killing me man!

i can bear anything and do any hard works ,but , leaving apart with my family and friends , god , i guess i will need more than a thousand time to adopt it T.T

I bet that i will shed my tears while leaving my home and cry deadly while on the way to airport .Gosh , the thing that i fear the most is BEING APART ! i have no confident in starting a relationship previously ,because i hate to be apart with someone i care , and i do not trust that ,a relationship can be maintained by caring , sorry , i do not trust it ,being apart is like , u won't get a chance to see his real face while he texts you , u will just listen to his voice and without seeing his expression , get to see his face through the internet but can't get any hugs ,the most shitty thing is , u will not get to know is he cheating you  , you will just get into it and believed it blindly , it is so stupid  , and the brainless thing is you  have to convince yourself that he is always being honest to you and never lie .God !!this whole thing is a crap man !!DISTANCE IS SUCKS !okay , even in friendship ,it makes me fear , there is no 100% possibility that we will still be as good as the old days , as people around are not the same , surrounding are totally different , slowly ,there is no topic and getting apart with each other .GOSH !!


okay , i will promise myself to be clam and be strong as in I AM WHO I AM !

the 20's truth !

The truth is ....she is getting serious ,day by day , and , i totally agree that she has some sickness like SERIOUS IMAGINARY !!!

What to do ?

A sudden guilty falls a part on me .....what to do ? first , to say that i really appreciate things that u had done to me , good things i meant ...ermm...but , on the other side, why are you always doing something bad to me too ??As , u said u appreciate me and bla bla bla.....i felt so scary !!!!

Im sorry that i cant protect u anymore as a friend, i already had enough of it ....so sorry ....i wish i could bear those bad things and care more about your feelings,yet , sorry , i failed to do so .IM SORRY !



Yes, im officially 20 !my friends wanted to give me a surprise , yet , i failed their plan ....as i  worked on my birthday >< haha!!anyway ,thanks for everything... i lost a few of them last year , yet  , i gained them back this year , but , i lost her this year ....ohhh myyyy....wth is going on my complicated life ....please just be simple and nice ....



And ,im MAD ,TOTALLY MAD on someone !!!!!WTH !!!!!!!!!!!!

ok , fine,perhaps , i have NO RIGHTS  to be UNHAPPY !!!


My 20's birthday wish is to be MORE TOUGH and STRONG !!

I hope i will be much more STRONGER to take the RESPONSIBILITY  of taking care my FAMILY !!

how desperate is it

ohh myyy

how desperate is it

falling on someone that i can't be with

shit man

i cant even tell anyone about it

not even my bestie

omg

what to do

it is so damn suffering

shit

arghhhh

sometimes things remain good if we keep silents

omg

fxck !!!

Im sick finally !!

Finally ,im sick!!!lol!!!

haha~~i was like wanted to get for so long already ~~~

because, of the last few weeks i have no time to get sick even dough i knew that im gonna sick ,but i was busy on working and assignments , have no time to get weak and sick><'

It is suffering man to get sick !!

HATE TO BE DIZZY !!!!

omg !!!

i need to let my mind rest

I'm TIRED !! I hope to shout out loudly that.......

Unfortunately , I can't.....

I'm TIRED to the city life, and some people around me ....freaking tired....

I NEED A BREAK SERIOUSLY !!!

Haiz.....

Was like so hard for me to have enough of rest ....

My mind is tired and my body too ....

I hope to go for a vacation without any mobiles and internet......

I wanted to stay on a peace vacation without those gadget and without those people and without the guy ...

Ahhhhh...I hate to think about things regarding my future as well...because I don't know what to do ....

And , I hate to deal with my brother ....TIRED !!!

I'M TIRED YOU KNOW !!!!???????

NEED AN EXTREMELY LONG VACATION WITHOUT ANT INTERRUPTIONS !!!


GOD PLEASE BLESS ME !!

I'M AFRAID THAT I CAN'T BEAR THIS KIND OF FEELING NO LONGER MORE !!

why so SERIOUS !!??

omg !!WHY SO SERIOUS aa??
ok laaa......don't actually know why am I so serious on it ><
And , I have no idea why am I so random about it ....
Ok la...I cant even concentrate in my ACCOUNT !!I DISLIKE IT !!
Arhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.......................................
wth man !!! arhhhhhh........
arhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.................................
don't come and disturb me man this f feeling !!!

CRUSH

I KNOW THIS KIND OF FEELING !!!
omg !!!!WHAT THE FUCK is this !!!??
omg !!!!am i OUT OF MY MIND ?????
WTH am i actually thinking ??!!
omg shit me pls !!!shit me !!!
oh god !!!im blissful that i get to hv a crash on someone ~
but , WHY is the guy !!
WTF !!!WTH !!!!SHIT!!!
pls go away this feeling !!
pls ...pls go pls go .....
it makes me so damn RANDOM !!!
OMG !!!what am i actually thinking man !!!FUCK ME !!
KILL ME PLS !!
omg !!!hate this CRUSH !!!
coz it is a WRONG person !!
I nid to GET RID of this fucking feeling !!!shit!!
arhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!