Accident * Hurt * It's gone *

Things happened too sudden , it was shocking .

My parents get into a car accident last week !

When I get the phone call from my dad , he told me mom was injured and awaiting for ambulance ...

I was like WTF !

But I was working can't leave my place.

Worried till the max !!!like BOOM !!!

I can't afford to lost my parents T.T

Luckily , they are still alive !!

My pity mom , her right limbs are injured !!! T.T

And the bastard !!! Drove the care to the wrong lane and bang my dad's car !

And , he was lucky enough to have a brother to protect him ....

Well , they managed to bribe the cops !!!Because , they are RICH BASTARDS !!

WHAT THE HELL!!!

He committed a crime , and he is still as free as a bird outside there !!

WHAT THE HACK IS GOING ON !

I swear ! I will be rich one day !!!

WAIT FOR ME !!! U ! BASTARD !



*********************************************************************************


He's totally gone from my heart !

I LOVE THE WAY HE LIES ....!!

But , stop!!

I'm starting to be sick of it .....

I realized !

I REALLY LOVE THE WAY HE LIES !



Gonna fly very soon !

I wish to get an answer from him before I fly .

I do , I can forgive .

It's near

Time flies huh ..... seriously ....

 A month later , I will be leaving my family .....

I bet I will miss them so much ......

My father <3

My mom <3

My sis <3

I hope time flies faster when im at Australia !!!


It's just 6 months over there .


Stay happy and home sick please abandon me !!! : )

TIME

Time is running faster and faster ,

Im gonna fly soon.

Worried .

Should I choose to continue at UQ ? or just stay in Malaysia ?

When money concerned .

I have no choice to choose .

I don't know .

Can I just be selfish this time ?

Frankly , I want to go .

It's been a long while , I have to give up things that I want to do , want to get , place that I want to go , even giving up traveling , although I have the money , yet , I can't !

Can I have something that I eager for this time ?

I'm just 21 , it is still so young for me to give up things because of MONEY !


T.T

Time Flies

Time flies .....

Another 2 months .....

Im gonna leave msia to aus soon ....

Not long , just a year .....

FEAR .....

everything is uncertain , it makes me fear so much .

money and friendship .

DISTANCE .

I hope I will be worrying too much bout friendship .

Should trust my friends =)

Gonna sit my ielts paper soon .

I dont really know what happened to me is like im so poor in everything .

I don't want to get a band lesser than 7 .

I don't know .

I AM SAD TODAY .

IT'S HURT SO MUCH .

LIKE SERIOUSLY .

IT WASN'T MY FAULT , BUT I GET BLAME .

I TRIED , EVEN IM DOING NOTHING , THINGS ALSO GET WORST .

dear god , i dont know what to do and how .

I AM LOST .

Don't ruin my confidence and self-trust in this way . I beg you GOD . like seriously , it is so painful again .

BYE heartache , HI busy !

Yea , time flies , is already time to let it go .....

Thanks for turning up in my life ....

I wish u were a better man , and I were a better girl .....

I long that we could be together ....

Yet , it is impossible , after going through so much .....

WE KNEW THAT , NOTHING IS WORKING OUT BETWEEN US .

yes ,time's up for us , nothing makes us right .

It's ohkay right now , feeling better , at least now I won't be awaken by the heartache in the middle of the night . It is blessing that, at least I could sleep .

Yea , right now , I'm kinda busy , no time to think about it .

Busy bout my ielts , works , assignments , presentation and quiz . And my plan of saving money .lol.

Actually, it is not as deep as I thought of , just that what are we insist of making it more complicated and aching .....

I guess you are ohkay right now , u could probably get a bunch of girls that are extremely better than me =)

YES , I PROMISE TO MYSELF IT IS TIME TO LET GO .
STOP  TORTURING YOU , ME & HER .
I don't want you to get hurt instead . If you are not hurting at all , thanks god , I will be greatly thankful that your heart is safe and not injured as mine =]

Thanks and bye , I will get someone that really knows me and appreciate everything in me :')
IT WILL NEVER BE YOU : )

HeartACHE

Like seriously , when u told me ....

And , when I knew it ,

I was like seriously heartache .....

there is a significant pain in the place so called HEART

was like I don't know how to help the pain ....

Very first time for sleeping middle of the night and be waken by the heartache ....

It is happening on me .... omg ......I don't why it would be in this way ....

I can feel the pain like seriously .

It never ends , pain , its like stabbing in the heart , fresh wound ....

how long it will be taken to heal the pain ... and the wound .....

I don't really know how long .

Im SORRY .

Sorry to you and her .

I am sorry , I should not insist on holding it .

I AM SORRY , PLEASE FORGIVE ME , SORRY !


Please allow me some time to clear the stain in our relationship , maybe we should never contact anymore , someday , I will be awake .

Im too scary now , I cant even stop thinking about it , was like the heart is already half-life .

PLEASE , I SWEAR , I JUST NEED TIME TO HEAL IT .

I SWEAR , I COULD DO IT , LET GO  :')


SORRY TO YOU , HIS GIRLFIREND .

I knew that we meet earlier that you two did , but it doesn't help out in the relationship between me and him .

I guess , it is already time to give up , as , there is no hope between us .

FEEL & HOPE

I felt something ...

And , it is so strong , like it is real ....

But , I don't know , did I feel wrongly ? or what I felt is true ....

I have no idea ...

To be frank , I am selfish .....

As , I hope that what I felt and my feelings right now are real  .....

I am sorry to be selfish , but I really hope it is .




***我喜欢你   是我的独家的记忆    谁也不行从我这个身体中拿走你***


SORRY FOR BEING SELFISH .

It's 2013 & I am turning to 21

Yes , it is already 2013 , while , time flies , really damn fast .

Yea , I admit , sometimes I do miss those moments that I had spent with her , like seriously .

Unfortunately , she did wrongly and I am not good enough to control it , things went wrong .

That day , when I talk to stephy , talked about my family , gosh , tears shed , was like god ...

I always feel sorry for my parents , as they willing to spend for my education, like sacrifice their life long saving , and I was like doing nothing , gosh ..... this makes me feels like SHIT !!

Somehow , I feel bad to my little sister , so I will just give her what she wants and pamper her . As my parents gave whatever is needed for me , my dad love me like anything , he just being so worry about my transport to uni , so he bought me a car , and its a vois , was like gosh , he said it is safer . I was like , I'M SORRY , IF IM SMART ENOUGH , DAD N MOM COULD SAVE MORE MONEY . was like HAIZ .

My dad is just like a god to me , he gave me everything and love me like no one could do it . My mom sacrificed everything for the family , what could I do more for  my family ?! Like seriously , I don't know !

I cried , because , I realized that , I'm grown up , a big girl . Cried , because , I knew that ,  I couldn't be childish and playful anymore . I cried , because I knew that when im 22 or 23 I couldn't go round like what I usually do  and be playful like I used to .I cried , because I knew that I have to take the responsibility to earn and take care my family .

My prior goal in my life for now is , save money to buy a house for my mom , I knew that she always feel insecure because of we have no house . haiz . Once upon a time , my dad is rich enough to have everything even few houses , but he sacrifice all of it for mine and brother's education .

A PROMISE TO  MYSELF : stay strong , work hard and save more to buy a house BEFORE 26 .


Another thing .... my feelings I could curb it well , nothing important .

BE HAPPY for my family : )